I AM A HYPOCRITE.
Even though I am feeling such shame; I also feel so energized and free.
I want to run through my neighborhood shouting:
“I AM A HYPOCRITE AND IT FEELS GREEEEAAAAAAAAAATTTTTTTT!”
The reason for the hypocrisy?
I FIRED MYSELF FROM GETTING COACHED.
Since I am a coach myself…….
The acceptable protocol for coaches: “Get coached on everything.” From list building, blog building, product building, membership site building, speaking, coaching and mindset; you can find a coach for everything!
Yet, when you look outside of yourself through a coach; you give your power away.
You begin to believe they can fix you; but they are not God or Jesus.
Everywhere I turned, I could feel in my heart that something was missing. I was exhausted and even though I love what I do; I didn’t want to do it anymore.
Within the last month I have had coaches tell me:
- I am a hypocrite for not wanting to be coached. (Yes, thank you!)
- I give away too much so I must not have self-esteem. (I am sure my self-esteem issues are a life-long project and even though this may be partly true; I actually give away a lot because I am damn good at giving gifts and it makes me happy).
- I am thoughtless because I structure things in certain ways that work for me. (This is a branding issue, deal with it)
- I have been told that the difference between me and another “successful” coach is the confidence. I have none. (I am a natural born presenter; I may be rough around the edges but I believe 110% in what I share).
- I have been told that you get in what you put out and if I don’t go to the live events that are included in my five figure coaching program then something is wrong with me. (In reality, I don’t get this group; they are super nice; but my gut says; what the he** are you doing? These are not your peeps!)
So, I fired them all.
Some know I fired them and some don’t even have a clue because they are too busy on their high horse spouting about how wonderful they are and how much money they make.
Once I made this decision and accepted my hypocritic role; I was so free!
Now I could work according to my authentic values! I am able to share my true feelings and market MY WAY!!
No more discovery sessions, no more closing people (gross), no more SEO keyword rich posts that make no sense and steal my authenticity.
I am jumping for joy!
With that being said; want me to be your coach?
Just Joking!
Yet, I want to share with you my philosophy on coaching so maybe it will help you find the coach that works for you: This is my perception and my philosophy; it isn’t right it isn’t wrong it is just my feelings.
- Don’t allow a coach to coach you without permission; even when you are paying them. The coach’s role is to be unattached; to listen and to mirror back your thoughts so they can ensure they heard you. Then they can ask permission from you to be coached. Too many times, I have had coaches that listen and then reply that I am afraid and that the fear isn’t real and blah blah blah…. Negating someone’s fears is rude and disrespectful. The coachs’ job is to help you move through them with YOU in the drivers’ seat.
- Most people hire coaches to be accountable to someone. My view of accountable = I say I am going to do A, B, and C and then the coach asks at the next meeting: did you do A, B and C? By the way the KNOW exactly what A, B, and C are. If you say no; then a discussion ensues that convinces you to do take action so you are not wasting your money and time. Most coaches don’t work that way unfortunately. Even though you are working with them, they put the responsibility on you, to take action. It just seems wasteful.
- If you are investing big bucks in one on one private coaching, I hope that the coach responds within 24 hours to your requests. I get it about boundaries and those boundaries are vital for every coach and client. However, make sure that those boundaries are spelled out clearly and not just assumed. I only have 3 private clients at a time because energetically that is all I can handle and still take care of myself. I pour myself into each because I take their investment seriously and whether I like it or not; my energy and time are both finite.
I just laid myself out there in all my hypocritical glory! Are you willing to as well?
Have you ever felt one way about something and then found yourself doing the exact opposite? Let me know in the comment section below..
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